That stain remained
No matter how much I cleaned
I scrubbed, I cleansed,
I ran away from those black streets
but that stain stayed.
I cried for help
begged to be freed
but no one paid any heed
I am all black now
unaccepted, unwanted fellow
Is it my fault I am only a shadow…
Author: Kanika
Random….
Once upon a time there was an ugly, unwanted girl. She always thought she deserves the worst. She wasn’t calculative but she could thoroughly calculate the weight of dreams were too heavy on her real self. That those wild imaginations never matched up to her realities. Looking at world she presumed herself to be far above them intellectually, while connecting to them made her feel so obtuse. Where was the real struggle? Inside or outside? Why did she have to have such negative notion about herself? Negative – – why this word never felt so wrong? Why this felt like it’s someone who’s close to her and stayed unlike others? May be because she was dark. She embraced emotions people vary to touch. Because sometimes it did bring some solace. But then was it the right thing to do? Prepare a standard chart to compare both worlds. Her’s and outside’s. It was clear outside world is just a plain stage with run-of-the-mill performance actors. And what she was, was not negative or antagonistic. She only recognized herself on a different level. Neither negative nor positive, it was her. Something to ponder upon. That she could start over and change how she thought of herself and not like the initial lines of this passage…
Pipe Dream
Do you want him to fight for you??
No!
I don’t want him to fight for me. He has his own battles to win. And I, mine.
I only want him to be there for me when I’m done fighting.
Calling Names…
The only time he didn’t cringe on being called names was when her voice whispered,
“You’re my devil.”
In retrospect
I lay
breathless
on dried out grasses
almost
at death’s door
staring at
bright noon Sun
reflecting on my thoughts
If you ever thought of shining
then why did you deny yourself burning??
A Keeper…
A person who’s definition is quite different than that in a dictionary. Someone who is close to you while being far away. Who looks at you and be a reason for your smile, harboring the purest feelings for you. Someone who doesn’t announce the affection to the world but only to you, makes you feel special in their own way when you’re rejected by the world, who is aware of your little needs and even the reasons of your annoyance, who notices the teeniest change in your tone and go crazy until you be back to normal, who’s priority list never gets amended because of you, who sits and willingly listen to your day’s crap & voluntarily share their energies to cure your grouchiness, who’s care you witness through actions and not just words. That person is a keeper. Keep them close no matter what. Don’t let go of that hand. A keeper can be found in your family, or friend or a partner. Keep those close to your hearts. Give them their due credit. They are irreplaceable.
Free-fall(en)
I fell from the star
burnt
crushed
torned-up
ripped
spirit-less
dragged out of haven
laughed to scorn
In all fairness, it seemed fine
When you first put me there
Dear Life
How much ever I wanted to control you, you slipped right through my fingers feeling everything as a confounded lie. Why didn’t you tell me before you weren’t supposed to be controlled rather supposed to be accepted & lived. Turn around time if you can. I want to do good to some people again.
Another Midnight poem
Trail of thoughts
Stillness of quiet
Overdue reforms
High-pitched screams
With a muted voice
Here’s #midnight
For you